Love and forgiveness are so intricately connected.

Love is the ultimate source of healing, it is the essence of the soul. Forgiveness allows love to happen.

Because the soul is buried deeply inside the being at varying degrees among different people, how much love one can perceive is based on how much the soul can “penetrate”, for lack of better terms, the human body. In other words, to what degree you identify with your soul being will determine your feelings of love.

To the fully enlightened ones such as Buddha and other divine figures, they have evolved to the level where their soul being is fully integrated to and shines through their human body. Therefore, they could perceive and give unconditional love as it’s their natural state of being. They are essentially the embodiment of love.

Because of the level of love that they are, to them everything is perfect and they are the manifestation of love. A prostitute is a perfect being just like everyone else in their eyes, while for the rest of us we feel filthy and disgusting.

How much we experience love is determined by our own level of consciousness.

When we lack love or are not feeling that love, it is not about anything outside of us that made us feel the lack of love. On a deeper level we are judging, blaming and sabotaging the self. In other words, we internalize and take personally the lack of love. The reason being we seek outside of us for LOVE; we look outside of us for confirmation of our own value.

Read Related Article: On the Four Levels of LOVE

Therefore, reinstalling self-love heals like no other.

Through his lifetime studies of regressing cancer patients, who had been given death sentences by traditional doctors, to their early childhood through hypnosis, Steven Parkhill found the initial life event for their ailments. Quite frequently it turned out to be hearing parents discussing a potential abortion at fetal stage.

Yes, at the fetal stage we already have perceptions and feelings. What makes this perception even more powerful is that it is not coming from the conscious mind but stems from a much deeper level of mind, the subconscious and beyond.

The subconscious mind perceives the discussion of a potential abortion as lack of love, and it internalizes it and initiates the self-mutilation program. The subconscious mind does not argue, reason, or analyze the circumstance.

For example, the potential parents might be going through extreme personal difficulties. Therefore the discussion of an abortion is not against the incoming being itself at all but more about the potential parents’ abilities to cope with the situation. Same goes with a young child and the feelings they perceived. It’s all about perception but not the actual event itself.

The subconscious internalizes the lack of love and inflicts it upon the self without argument or analysis.

Working with forgiveness of the parents in the subconscious mind heals the patient of their ailments, even though the incident happened a long time ago. When working through forgiveness of others, it is the process of undoing the judging, blaming and sabotaging the self, which releases the self and allows self-love and self-acceptance.

Not forgiving others obstruct self-love. Forgiveness of others restores self-love and love is the ultimate healing force. All forgiveness is the forgiveness of the self. It has nothing to do with outside the self.

Read Related Article: Forgiveness is The Brake On The Wheel Of Karma

Forgiveness requires one to be able to see what IS, with no personal attachment.

Forgiveness is being able to NOT take things personally in life and not internalizing and blaming onto the self. This may contradict what we have been taught. What we normally understand is that when we are hurt, we need to retaliate or else we are weak and cowardly. Forgiveness requires tremendous amounts of courage, love/compassion, and letting go.

Someone may have inflicted upon you a feeling of hurt, but it’s not so much against you than they are acting out their own weaknesses. Forgiveness requires one to see what IS, with no personal attachment and internalization of the pain onto the self.

It is a process of tremendous letting go, which the human ego makes nearly impossible to do.

For example, imagine you are a war veteran. During the brutal war you were seriously injured by your enemies. On some level you hate your enemies, especially with the personal injuries they inflicted upon you and you hope that they all die.

How can you forgive those enemies who almost killed you?

And those enemies who killed your comrades?

Those bastards who dropped a bomb at you?

From a human ego perspective with our logical thinking it’s simply impossible to forgive them. Therefore, the result is carrying the emotional scar with you for the rest of your life, as well as whatever bodily malfunctions those emotions caused you.

There are those who were scared by sexual insults at an early age. There are also many other incidences to a much lesser degree which might have hurt us in the past. Heck, to a young child their sibling having one more bit of cake than they did is hurtful to them. They may throw a temper tantrum, causing the parents to yell at them. Even though the episode passed as time goes on, you never know how much the lack of love the child internalized from the event and subsequent events of this nature.

The bottom line is, we all carry emotional baggage one way or another. On one level or another, we all need to learn how to forgive and let go.

What we want to achieve is on a personal level we can forgive others and release ourselves, and it needs to be done on an individual basis. For forgiveness to happen you have to rise in consciousness to reach a higher understanding and true letting go.

Let’s use the war example.

Now you can rise in consciousness and realize that those enemies trying to kill you are not because of you personally. They are caught up in whatever role they had to play in life, just like yourself. If you can stand in their shoes and see from their perspective and see their pain, you start to develop compassion and see the connection between you and them. Compassion allows forgiveness to happen.

Forgiveness is not possible without compassion, without the ability to feel what another being is feeling. Therefore, you need to be able to get out of your own mind and view from a higher perspective where there’s connection between you and the one you assumed hurt you.

If you perceive the other person as a total monster, then it will set up a block for forgiveness. Sure, they might have appeared so in the physical world, but that is not what they really are. Their soul is deeply buried in their human psych.

Their soul, which is their true essence, is suffering significantly even if they don’t seem so on the human level. In this case, for forgiveness to happen you have to be able to rise to your soul level to be able to peel off the surface layers and look deeper into the core of their being. Their core being is love, but it is buried too deep that it cannot surface. Their core being needs help; they are suffering.

When you put things into that expanded perspective, would you forgive them?

Would you forgive a being who is suffering deeply inside?

Would you release your own suffering of no forgiveness?

Would you let go of the outdated emotional baggage you had been carrying?

Initiate forgiveness and letting go of the emotional scar that non-forgiveness had inflicted upon you. Forgiveness is a self-healing process, it has nothing to do with others but everything to do with your own self. Forgiving others is to forgive yourself. For your own selfishness, you should forgive others.

Until you can truly forgive yourself and others, you won’t be able to love yourself unconditionally. When you are in the vibrations of self-love it is impossible to carry the none-forgiveness of others just like you won’t see snow in hot lava. Lower vibrations of energies simply cease to exist in higher vibrations. To forgive others is to love oneself. Love and forgiveness are intricately connected.

Practice love and forgiveness. 

Sue Maisano is a healer and author of The Healing Journey. If you love the message in the article, please share it with someone you care. Together we’ll raise human consciousness and make the world a better place.

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