Emotional intelligence is the ability to perceive, recognize and categorize one self’s or other individual’s emotions and feelings, and use the emotional information to guide towards conscious decisions. It is the capability of harnessing the power of emotions and use it positively instead of run by your emotions.
Good emotional intelligence helps improve relationships by you being sensible and tentative to other individuals’ needs, wants and feelings. By being considerate of other people’s feelings, needs and wants, you are in for a harmonious relationship. It does not mean that you compromise yourself of course, simply be aware of other people’s emotions helps you make better decisions that could be mutually beneficial. If used in a work place, you increase your professional outlook. If used at home, you create a harmonious home environment. Not only that, you will also be vigilant and watchful of your own thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
Since emotional intelligence is intelligence, you can work on it to increase it.
Step 1: Monitor your emotions, how would you label your current emotions?
Become self-conscious of your current emotions. This requires you to the mentally present at each moment and become conscious of your thoughts. How are you feeling right now? Are you happy? Sad? Calm? Worried? Agitated? Worried? Give your feeling and emotions a label that describes it.
Step 2: Does the emotion you have right now helps you solve problems?
As a human being we all have some level of emotional intelligence, the difference is in managing your emotions. If you think that someone is overacting to what you said or did, don’t rush to conclusions, judgements, or anger. Instead after labeling your emotions, stop and ask yourself if the emotion you have right now helps you solve the problems you are facing or does it make it worse? Asking this question is very important because you will know that having a negative emotion does not help you solve the problem. What you need to do is to first change your emotion so you are better mental state to solve the issues that needs to be solved.
Step 3: Change your emotions in the positive direction for decision making
This step differentiates people who runs their lives by their emotions and those who make deliberate effort to direct their emotions for better decisions. Many negative emotions such as anger, hatred, jealousy are detrimental to our decision making. You may jump into action driven by these negative emotions, but you regret later, once that the negative emotion had passed you realized how silly your decisions were in that type of emotions.
People with high emotional intelligence does not mean that they do not experience these feelings like the rest of us, they do experience these feelings. However, they can channel these feelings and will it to pass before they make important decisions. Emotions are in constant flow, they change from one to another, and you never got stuck in one emotion for prolonged period of time. Emotions come and go, therefore, don’t be boggled down by negative emotions. Simply watch it and see it pass, then make your conscious decisions. Better still, change your emotions life flip of a switch.
Follow the info-graphics below to find out how emotional intelligent you are (no matter where you are you can improve it with the three steps mentioned):